“Of course it’s hard, if it were easy everyone would be doing it” my friend said reassuring me after I had returned home from another day door knocking; the job of the traveller in Australia, I felt beaten, working on my own all day, coming back to my (albit beautiful) but empty apartment, I couldn’t help but wish I was at home with my family, my dog and my best friends, if I was going to be poor doing a job that was soul destroying wouldn’t I rather be doing it at home?!
It’s been a really hard few weeks here in Melbourne, I left a house I was deeply unhappy living in and had been couchsurfing round a friends before leaving for a hostel; I then got lucky (thank you, Karma) and got offered a hella amazing apartment fifteen minutes out of the city for a price so good that it would make your jaw drop. The downside (if you can even consider it that), is that the apartment is basically mine alone, my flatmate and I have opposing schedules which means that we almost never bump into each other, and when we do it’s fleeting. I would relish this alone time, I really would, if, I didn’t work alone as well; I’m currently a door to door survey collector whose company has currently got a grand total of one people working for them, Hello! So I spend most of my day, completely alone.
Now, before I get the mini violins out and we can all start an orchestra on my behalf, let me just say this, I travel primarily alone, being in my own company doesn’t freak me out or make me sad, I don’t get bored easily and I don’t need to have people around me. BUT! (here she goes), I do love being around people, I love the banter, the laughter and the stories generated by being in the company of others; I love meeting new people, finding out about them and patchworking friendships from common interests. Yet, over here in the outer city subs, I don’t have that easy connection to my friends, and if I’m honest, it really isn’t fun.
So after the second week of returning home after another day of not working with anyone I felt horrible, I deeply missed home and my best friends being close, I longed to be with the friends I had created bonds with over the past decade, my soul sisters, I missed my family and my dog, I missed them all. Now I know that missing people is all part and parcel of it, I should really stop being so ungrateful for the life that I have generated for myself, I have longed for a life of perpetual travel for as long as I can remember, what did I expect that every day was going to be jam packed with adrenaline and adventure? No, I didn’t, I expected to miss my people and my home comforts; I expected that some days were going to be hard, that I would get sick and shock horror, I might get lonely.
So am I going to go home? Probably not, as much as I long for the people who I left, I’ve travelled alone enough to know that this is just part of the story, my story. It is tough, but like Lois said, if it were easy then everyone would be doing it. I just have to get on with it, and maybe find another job, one where there are people, real people that I can laugh with, until then, I stand on my own, patchworking my own story that I will look back on in a few months, or years time and smile at how ridiculous I was being.
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Have you ever felt like giving up your travels and going home? Have you ever done it? I want to know all about your story, how you feel when you’re on the road? Because we all know that it isn’t all sunshine and rainbows all of the time. You can also find me over on Twitter and Instagram where I share daily travel bites and photos; don’t forget that Tuesday is also Travel Talk on Twitter Day (#TTOT) so nip over and join in the travel chat with some of the best people in the business, until next time. For now, I need to get ready, I have another day of door knocking ahead of me, happy travels.